My Poem for a certain nobody.

Hey. Okay yeah I always regret what I say
And I know its only been about a day.
But already I'm missing you.
Without a single thought of kissing you,
I wish we could go back to how things use to be
When things were simple just you and me.
But time changes more than just a clock
You shut my heart down and now it has a lock.
And the key was given away a long time ago
A display of my affection just another way to show.
How I feel what is real something wrong.
Why'd we wait so damn long.
I'm stuck in thinking about how we use to be
I wish you saw everything the way I  see.
I miss you, yes that's all true
But I don't miss what I felt around you.
I miss the hangouts the movies the car rides
The times when youd sit and our hands and feet would collide
Watching you cry to a fake death
I wish I would've never left.
Love works in many ways
But this one is turning into nothing but plays.
We know what'll happen again and again
So why the hell don't we just stays friends?
I love you and miss you but feel all too hurt
I'm giving up on you because your a big flirt
And that isn't what I like
Granted I am alike
Hell I really miss your feet
Its something I wish I could keep
The next girl better compare
Or else everyday ill be ripping out my hair.
Why am I writing this it has no meaning
I'm lying next to Wes wishing we were on the phone screaming
At each other trying to kill one another
Feel more towards you then I feel for my brother.
God I miss you and love you like never before
I wish you'd of given me one more chance to score.

My Cynicism.

This weekend was amazing for me. Not really honestly but I loved it even though I barely did anything. Went to a party with my older brother and when I got there I ran into a couple of old friends and most importantly my old best friend that I haven't seen in ages. We kicked off the night and had a great time. He isn't my best friend anymore because I transferred schools thinking some stupid reason I don't even remember now. Point is I've been thinking alot that if I had never left that school how different would my life be now. I do like my new school but was the change really that necessary? I had a strong urge to leave but only left to find another reason to leave again. Here I chase after a female who hasn't given me the time of day. A waste. Ive come to tthe conclusion that I don't care anymore. About anyone. Or anything. I went out to eat today at a Chinese food buffet with some friends that I don't hang out with much anymore because they've become very boring. I had gotten a fortune cookie that said I shouldn't give in to cynicism. Pssh that how I want my life to be. Fuck the world and fuck everybody. When I die I'm not taking anything but my soul and memories and if you happen to be in there congratulations you made a small minor difference in my life. We were all born alone and we die alone.